hang on, wait a second

Ironically (or not) the son of a friend of mine is going through this exact experience. He has a longstanding habit of doing “ninja moves” — not real martial arts kata but stuff he picked up from the media — when he’s bored in public, waiting in line, that kind of thing. It was boyishly cute when he looked little and harmless, but just recently he grew eight inches in eight months. Now he looms and he’s caught flack for unintentionally scaring strangers. After spending most of his young life trying to look scary so people will take him seriously or at least not mess with him, he’s now got to learn the exact opposite: body language and mannerisms that will constantly reassure people that he’s not going to hurt them.

Never be afraid to apologize to your child. If you lose your temper and say something in anger that wasn’t meant to be said, apologize. Children need to know that adults can admit when they are wrong.

American Humane Society (via maninsun)

This is so, so important.

(via foundbysara)

Absolutely true. I try so hard to do this when I screw up with my kid. She’s almost 4, but we’ve already got “I’m sorry” and “I accept your apology” down on both ends. So much so that when my crazy-ass MIL hauled off and screamed at her and called her a brat, my daughter marched right up to her not 3 minutes later and said, “Grandma, you need to say you’re sorry for yelling at me.” My MIL never apologizes for ANYTHING, but she did that time, and then my awesome kid came right back with an “I accept your apology.”

I hated the circumstances. But in spite of all the struggles I go through as a parent, if I’ve managed to teach her anything, I’m glad she’s starting to learn that apologizing is important. Even if some of the implications are still over her head, it’s laying the foundation for connections to be made down the road.

(via jj-lockd)

In politics, this is called the difference between a government of laws and a government of men. In a government of men, the big shots (usually male) can override the rules if they want to and their underlings are expected to just go along with it. Certainly the big shots aren’t held accountable the way their underlings are. In a government of laws, everybody, even the big shots, must follow the same set of rules or atone when they fail to follow them. Bringing up kids in a household where the grown-ups submit to the rules of right and wrong the same as the kids do is a political act; it prepares the kids to be the kind of citizens who hold their leaders accountable.

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